My Best Man

My Best Man

When it came time to select the “best man” for my marriage ceremony, the choice was an obvious one. I don’t know when I had determined to ask my dad, but in the printed wedding program I offered a short explanation by saying he was the “best man that I knew.” He loved his Heavenly Father and he taught his kids to do the same. He set the tone for a great home life and he taught me more than what I can begin to document in the space of a mere “post.” The bottom line: I loved and respected my father more than I can begin to express. Anytime I encounter a person who has lost their father, I tell them the story you’re about to read. This captures a portion of what made my dad so special. It was the wisdom he taught coupled with the example he set that made him “my best man.”

Honorable Discharge

It was the first part of November in 1990. I had recently been discharged from the USMC with close to a decade’s worth of service. I had spent the more than half of that time going to night school anticipating the day where I would be a civilian once again and needing a marketable skill in order to make a living. Working for the government has its perks, one of which being a consistent income and launching into the civilian work force was more than a little daunting when you have no job and no real idea of what to expect. What made my dynamic even more subjective is that while I had a degree, I had determined to try and make my living as a musician. On the day of my discharge ceremony, my father was present, having made the trip from upstate New York. After the awards were distributed and hands were shook, Dad and I loaded my stuff into my car and made the trek from Virginia to Nashville, Tennessee.

Nashville Bound

We drove to my cousin’s house and decided that I would set up shop there for the time being. Sharon’s home was in need of some minor repairs and Dad, being the consummate handy man, volunteered to get those things done while I settled in. At one point, he needed to head to Home Depot to get some materials and I accompanied him with the idea that we would load up what we purchased and I would head back to the house to finish the work he had started. Dad, on the other hand, would get in his car and start the 10 hour drive back to Hilton, New York. As we finished loading up my car with what we had just purchased, Dad and I got ready to say “good bye.” I mentioned to him that this was “it” and he looked at me asked what I meant by that. I told him that front this point on, once he was on his way back home, my “journey” was officially beginning. Financial security, succeeding as a musician, establishing a community of friends – all of these things were unknowns and I confessed to him that I was a little intimidated. I don’t know what I expected to hear from him – perhaps some kind of pep talk with phrases like “You can do it” or “You’re ready.” Instead he just looked at me and said “That’s why I raised you.”

That’s Why I Raised You

That may not resonate with you like it did me. But what I heard him say with that four word response was that he had prepared me in the way he had brought me up and this wasn’t the time to feel either overly anxious or melancholy. Rather, it was the time to get busy and put into action the values and the work ethic he had taught me. Frankly, I’m not sure if he could’ve said anything more encouraging. This wasn’t the time to be dwelling on the “what if’s” or the “I’d rather’s.” Instead, I was now mentally rolling up my sleeves with a resolve to move forward. Several years later, that conversation would come back to me as I was wiping the the tears from my face at my father’s Memorial Service. He was sixty years old. After a year in the hospital, waiting for a new heart and then battling the difficulties that sometimes accompany a heart transplant, his body had given out and we were now remembering the life of David Gust. My grief was what you expect as far as a son trying to emotionally process the loss of his father. While some can spend a long time recovering from the death of a parent, I was able to better process things because of the memory of a conversation we had in the Home Depot parking lot. “That’s why I raised you.”

A Legacy of My Own

In my mind, I heard my dad say that to me once more as I was contemplating how I would never see him again this side of Heaven. This time, however, it wasn’t so much about pursuing my dreams as much as it was taking the baton he was now handing to me and honoring his legacy by being the “best man” that I could be as a husband and as a father. I still miss my dad. There’s times I wish I could talk to him and get his perspective on different things. I can imagine him laughing at my jokes, celebrating my triumphs and breathing into me the kind of encouragement that’s required when you’re headed in the wrong direction. But anytime I teeter on the threshold of something resembling an overly emotional disposition as I long for my father’s presence, I can hear him say “That’s why I raised you,” and I’m back at it – determined to be the man he raised me to be and inspired by the thought of seeing him again and being able to honor him with a legacy of my own.

Love you, Dad!

What Would Your Billboard Say (Part I)?

Muscular Christianity BillboardIf you were tasked with creating a billboard that promoted the advantages of being a Christian, what would it say? Let’s take it a step further and say that you can design it however you want, but you have to leave out the idea of eternal life as well as the notion that says “He helps you with your problems.”

It makes you think, doesn’t it?

John 3:16 and verses like Isaiah 42:10 and John 16:33 demonstrate that missing hell and going to heaven along with having a Divine Source of assistance in moments of trouble are both very much a part of the Christian’s landscape. But, if your approach to Christ is limited to either a funeral home or a major crisis when you’re feeling like you’re at the end of your rope, then you’re missing out on the vast majority of what God brings to the table in the context of a relationship with Him.

In John 17:3, Jesus defines eternal life as “knowing God.” That’s not something that begins when your heart stops, rather it’s something to be enjoyed, experienced and deployed right here, right now. And while it’s certainly a game changer when you’re dealing with a problem that threatens to overwhelm you, it was never intended to be something you reached for only in times of duress. That said, how does knowing God translate to an advantage when comparing the life of a believer to their unsaved counterpart?

What would your billboard say?

I’ve got a few ideas.

Check it out: Read more

What Would Your Billboard Say (Part II)?

Muscular Christianity BillboardI) Intro

Last time we talked about “Billboard Christianity,” we talked about one possible tag line being “It’s All Good” meaning that, as a believer, you have access to a perpetual Source of optimism because you

  •  know Who’s in charge
  • your sense of fulfillment isn’t based on goalposts that never stop moving

This week we’re looking at another tag line. This one is “Pray Big.”

II) Pray Big

To the right, you see a license plate that belongs to a friend of mine. “Pray Big” is consistent with the message communicated in several Scriptures. Take a look:

A) He Knows You (better than you know yourself)

For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. (Jer 29:11 [see also Josh 1:8])

No one knows you like God knows you (see 1 Sam16:7;  Jer 17:10; Matt 10:30). He had a plan in mind for you before you ever entered this world (Ps 139:16). That plan is tailored expressly for you (Eph 2:10). Because He wired you in a way that results in your having both the ability and a passion for doing what He created you to do, rest assured that the greatest amount of fulfillment you’re ever going to experience in your life is doing the things you were created to do. That being the case, anytime you’re intentional about seeking God’s direction, you’re doing yourself a favor because He’s going to steer you in the direction that results in the greatest good for your life.

B) Ask!

If you could ask God for anything, what would it be? Do you think you would get it? Why or why not? Take a look at what God told David in the aftermath of his affair with Bathsheba. At this point, David’s busted. He’s getting chewed out by God through the prophet Nathan and he deserves it. He committed adultery and then he turned around and used his authority as king to orchestrate the death of one of his bodyguards in order to cover his tracks. He knows what he has coming and he’s not putting up any kind of argument. In the midst of God’s rebuke, the Lord says something that’s significant. Take a look:

I gave your master’s house to you, and your master’s wives into your arms. I gave you the house of Israel and Judah. And if all this had been too little, I would have given you even more. (2 Sam 12:8)

God’s listing every beautiful woman that David had access to along with the throne. And then He says if that hadn’t been enough, He would’ve given David even more. Think about what God is saying, here. David had noticed a woman that was not his to pursue. The fact that he had a desire for female companionship was not the deal-breaker. Rather, it was the object of his desire and the way in which he went about pursuing that which was forbidden by violating two commands that carried the death penalty. Look at what it says in Luke:

 If you then, though you are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give the Holy Spirit to those who ask him!” (Luke 11:13)

Now consider what Jesus says in Matthew:

Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives; he who seeks finds; and to him who knocks the door will be opened. (Matt 7:7-8)

…and then in James:

You do not have, because you do not ask God. (Jas 4:2)

God is not stingy. When you ask, He hears and He stands ready to answer your prayer. Consider this: Anything you ask for is going to pale in comparison to what He already gave in terms of the sacrifice of His Son:

He who did not spare his own Son, but gave him up for us all – how will he not also, along with him, graciously give us all things? (Rom 8:32)

So, with that in mind, ask! Go for the brass ring. Pray big! Think about this:

 Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us, to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, for ever and ever! Amen. (Eph 3:20-21)

You can’t out-imagine God. Pray for big things and do so confidently knowing that He hears and He’s more than willing to answer. Now, He doesn’t always answer the way we like and this is where the worship component of all this needs to kick in.

C) Worship

Go back to that passage in Luke:

Which of you fathers, if your son asks for a fish, will give him a snake instead? Or if he asks for an egg, will give him a scorpion? (Luke 11:11-12)

Fact is, sometimes we ask for the equivalent to a snake or a scorpion. We don’t see it that way, but God can see things that we can’t so He says “No.” Other times we might be asking for something that is absolutely noble and God either says “No” or “Wait.” Either response can be exasperating but only if you neglect to keep the first part of the Lord’s Prayer center stage in your approach.

Father, hallowed be your name…(Luke 11:2)

The word “hallowed” means to “establish as holy.” In other words, before you launch into your petition, you begin by honoring God as being holy. In other words, you start by reminding yourself of Who it is you’re talking to. God is not your personal vending machine. He’s not your gofer. And should He respond to your prayer by saying either “No” or “Wait” – processing that response from a position that acknowledges God for Who He is far easier than if you try to do that while maintaining God as subordinate to your authority. That’s when you can become indignant and worse. II)

III) Conclusion

It is not so much true that “prayer changes things” as that prayer changes me and I change things. God has so constituted things that prayer on the basis of Redemption alters the way in which a man looks at things. Prayer is not a question of altering things externally, but of working wonder in a man’s disposition. (“My Utmost for His Highest” by Oswald Chambers, August 28th reading)

God often works miracles through very common means. He uses people to accomplish His agenda and it’s not uncommon for an answer to your prayer to be delivered via something seemingly natural (see Luke 17:14). But because it’s God Who did it, it is therefore supernatural and you want to be able to appreciate it as such.

When you pray and you do so reverently, you change. God sweeps up the distractive dust balls that are scattered on your spiritual floor and you’re given a chance to see things from a different perspective. That is the true miracle of prayer. Sure, the material answer to your request is important, but it’s the change that He exacts in you that is truly amazing. So pray big! Consider Who You’re talking to:

  • The Creator of the Universe (Col 1:16)
  • The One Who loves you and knows you perfectly (Ps 139:16; Matt 10:30; 1 Jn 3:1)
  • The One Who gave His Son for you (Rom 8:32)
  • The One from Whom all good things originate (Jas 1:17)

His answer is assured and whatever that answer is, in terms of the material result you’re requesting, rest assured that His answer is exactly what it needs to be in order for your welfare to be accomplished. And in the interim, you have been changed because your perspective is being aligned with the Greatness and the Goodness of God which produces a more optimistic and a healthier disposition. Believe and trust (Jas 1:5-8). Move forward knowing that God is aware, able and active as far as your request is concerned. Don’t settle for an existence that’s limited to the physical possibilities as dictated by a cynical, human mindset. Pray big and know that God is exactly Who He claims to be, no request is too big and no appeal goes unanswered. For some final thoughts about your, “billboard,” click here

What Would Your Billboard Say (Part III) ?

Muscular Christianity BillboardIt’s one of those questions that can take you by surprise in that conventional church culture puts a lot of emphasis on who we are apart from Christ. Many of the sermons and a lot of the Praise and Worship we sing focus more on the insufficiency of the believer rather than the all sufficiency of God. As a result, the inclination is to process one’s relationship with Jesus as something that comes to bear primarily in the context of a crisis rather than a Resource that’s poised to positively impact every play you deploy on the field rather than something that only applies when you’re on the sidelines. You are more than your wounds and better than your sin. Not because of who you are but because of Who Christ is in you. To restrict Christ’s Influence to crisis situations only is to overlook both the Attitude and the Ability He’s given you to excel and not just endure. Bear in mind, when God says, “excel,” He’s talking about all things at all times (2 Cor 9:8). That includes your performance at work, the way you love the people you care about, the way you work out, even the way you mow your lawn.

And whatever you do, whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him. Col 3:17)

Do you smell that that? That’s the aroma of excellence!

You want to reek of excellence. Being a Christian gives you an edge. Your work ethic, your decision making, your career, your role as a husband and a father – all of these tasks and responsibilities become opportunities to excel when you’re deploying the mind of Christ (1 Cor 2:16) and the Power of God (Phil 2:13; Col 1:29). And when you’re doing it right, you’re not just a profound statement plastered on a billboard, you are genuinely… …eye catching. Joseph was eye catching (Gen 41:37-38), David was eye catching (1 Sam 16:6-13), Paul was a brilliant Pharisee (Acts 22:3; Phil 3:5), a Roman citizen (Acts 22:28) and a follower of Christ. His religious training, his intellect and his citizenship combined to make him… …eye catching. Look at Matthew 5:16:

16 In the same way, let your light shine before others, that they may see your good deeds and glorify your Father in heaven. (Matt 5:16)

And here’s the thing: You’re not “eye catching” simply because of the talent and accomplishments that can be seen on the surface. You’re lighting up every room you walk into because of the Purpose, Peace, and Power that characterizes your approach to every moment of your life.

My frame was not hidden from you when I was made in the secret place, when I was woven together in the depths of the earth. 16 Your eyes saw my unformed body; all the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be. (Ps 139:15-16)

Life isn’t just a random sequence of events that have no real meaning apart from however you’re inclined to respond in that moment. When you’re looking at your world and seeing it as something God intended, your circumstance is now infused with a sense of Divine Purpose. The situation itself is no different than it was a split second ago, but you’re now looking at it through the lens of God’s Sovereignty.
  • What was trivial is now significant (Rom 8:28)
  • What was nerve wracking is now calm (Is 26:3)
  • What was prideful is now humble (Phil 2:13)
  • What was doubtful is now possible (Lk 1:27)
  • What was despairing is now optimistic (Ps 42:5)
Every question mark is now replaced with an exclamation point in that while you can’t see what the future holds, you know Who holds the future. And with that sense of certainty comes a confidence and a Strength that manifests itself as a stable disposition (Is 26:3), a cheerful demeanor (1 Thess 5:16-18), a solid work ethic (Col 3:23) and a consistent performer (Phil 2:13). You reek of excellence. And people who reek of excellence tend to be the kind of people you enjoy hanging out with because their joy and their energy is infectious and that makes a conversation about the hope that you have not only more likely, but also more compelling. In this series, we talked about your Billboard and how you would promote a relationship with Christ in a way that included more than just what happens after you pass away. We talked about how you want to “pray big,” how it’s “all good” and we concluded with how you want to “reek of excellence.” While all of these things can benefit you in some very practical ways, what makes them so powerful is how they benefit others as well and ultimately point them in the direction of their Heavenly Father. And that is the true purpose of our Billboard!