Make It Sing | Part III

Welcome to “Make it Sing | Part III!”

In Part I we looked at how applying God’s take on any given issue is going to translate to the best possible outcome regardless of what the situation or issue may be. Using the illustration of the way an engine is sometimes described as “running like a song,” we want our relationship to not just “work,” we want it to “sing.”

In Part II, we looked at the nuts and bolts of reading God’s Word and how you don’t want to process it as a “noble chore,” but as something that’s done to ensure that you’re operating from a Position of Strength in everything you say, think and do.

In Part III, we’re going to look at the three things a woman needs in order for your relationship with her to truly “sing!”

Three Homeruns

Numbers tend to be symbolic. In Scripture, the both the number 7 and the number 3 represent “wholeness.”

You see it in Nature (height, width, depth), you see it in human beings (body, mind and spirit) and you even see it in God Himself (Father, Son and Holy Spirit).

A woman needs three things to feel comfortable in a relationship:

  • Trust – it’s not just being faithful to her as much as it’s being faithful to your King (1 Sam 16:7). When your heart’s right with God, she can trust you in the way you’re going to treat her and subordinate your will to her welfare “…out of reference for Christ (Eph 5:21).”
  • Communication – she needs you to talk to her. Being “strong and silent” is appropriate sometimes, but she needs to know what’s on your mind and how you’re feeling. You also want to make sure that you’re building her up and letting her know that she’s your one great love (Prov 25:11; Eph 5:18-20; 1 Thess 5:11).
  • Security – women are wired for security.  You can see that in their “motherly instincts,” as far as being committed to the protection of their children. Females are genetically weaker than their male counterparts. Women, therefore, are looking to lessen the feeling of vulnerability that’s triggered by the presence of any kind of “threat,” be it a financial shortcoming, an emotional void or physical harm (Ruth 3:9). While there is no lasting sense of security or significance provided by any kind of human agency, men (husbands) are nevertheless commanded to protect and provide for their wives and their families (Gen 2:15; Eph 5:25; 2 Thess 3:10; 1 Tim 5:8).

At first glance, you can look at these things and not feel like they’re especially challenging. But you want to ensure that each of these qualify as legitimate homeruns and not just base hits.

Think of it this way…

The woman you claim to love is not just your girlfriend, she’s her father’s daughter and she is her Savior’s creation. You don’t honor their commitment and the sacrifice they made for the sake of her wellbeing by allowing yourself to be content with any kind of compromise that can damage her in any way.

Even the “appearance” of evil is specified in Scripture as something you want to avoid:

Abstain from all appearance of evil. (1 Thess 5:22)

This isn’t just about the way things are, this applies as well to the way things appear – specifically the reputation of God and the ones you care about:

  • God’s Reputation (Matt 5:16; 1 Thess 2:12; Phil 1:27)
  • Her Reputation (Eph 5:33; 1 Pet 3:7)
  • Your Reputation (Prov 22:1; 1 Pet 2:15; 3:16)

Remember, “reputation” is not based not only on what people see, but what they’re led to believe. Granted, you can take that to an unhealthy extreme, but being sensitive to appearances compels you to expand your field of vision to include those things that can corrupt a relationship, yet go unnoticed apart from a wise appreciation for the corrosive effect of compromise (1 Cor 10:23-24; 1 Pet 5:8). Now you’re putting some points on the board and not just putting a man on base!

Something Changes

You ever notice how when you introduce the name of “Jesus” into a casual conversation, the whole mood of the room changes?

There’s something about that Name that effects even the very air you breathe – at least it feels that way.

I’ve always processed that “shift” in the way the tone of an environment changes when you speak the Name of Christ as indicative of His Reality.

You can say “God” or “Christ” and not perceive a noticable change, but say “Jesus” and it’s like you’ve opened the door of a dark room and the light now streaming in makes people have to adjust the eyes of their heart and mind.

Something changes…

Finding a wife is a good thing (Prov 31:10). You don’t want to gloss over the practical wisdom that’s coming from the One Who invented Humanity and Marriage to begin with. The verses and wisdom you see documented here in this essay aren’t just good little “cooking tips.” Rather, they represent a portion of the template that God Himself put in place and there’s no better Strategy for securing a successful relationship or living your best life than applying what God has to say about whatever it is you’re wanting to do.

Something changes when you love someone using the Perspective and the Power of the Holy Spirit (1 Thess 3:11. You’re no longer depending on the limited resources of your best intentions. Now you’ve got the True Muscle and the Perfect Knowledge of your Redeemer inspiring your thoughts and animating your actions.

Don’t just “make it work…”

Make it sing!

Click here to read “Make It Sing | Part IV”

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